Whether I went back to the state I was when in perth few months back, is still uncertain...
I lost my appetite, literally. i'm sure i've lost couple of pounds within few days.. but i'm not starving myself...and i always make sure i eat before drinking any alcohol. .
its really hard to cope, someone who u thought u could spend your life with just end it with a snap of his fingers, as though he was making a decision to drink coffee or tea. whatever we had, those that i held in uttermost importance, treasured and cherished were just like a puff of smoke, blown away with every puff from a smoker's mouth.
it's really a pity. it really breaks my heart. i'm not really good with words, but sometimes the feeling inside is so terrible that i could just break down in the middle of nowhere... walking past the substation...buying lunch...on the way home...
but just when you are thinking that i;m wallowing in my own self pity, i'm not.
just when you are thinking that i'm detached and shattered to bits, i'm not
at the end of the day. i know that i'll always be blessed with love... simply because i know how and am not afraid to love. I don't retreat into my shell to avoid everything.. and most importantly, i know how to cherish the ones who are important to me. I don't say it, I show it.
thanks crystal for the lovely tulips.. it really made my day...i was really very touched...
thanks kiat, for buying me the cough syrup and being there for me since the breakup. (i'm still coughing though =\ )
thanks mei si for clubbing with me, even though we felt like we were the oldest there.
and also, everyone.. who listened, comforted and told me that they will always be there for me.
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